Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
