Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Randomize