you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
