god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
