dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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