I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Operation Purity has been aborted
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Randomize
