16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
