Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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