Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
