Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
