I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I have fence marks all over my body
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
