The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
