You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
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