are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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