Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
