Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
