The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize
