We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize