he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
