He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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