guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
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