You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
