on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
