Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
