I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
