its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
