please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
