Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
this just has baby written all over it
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize
