Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
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