I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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