Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize