I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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