his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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