he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
