And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
