I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
Randomize
