you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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