Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
