Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
