I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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