69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
