You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Randomize
