dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize
