Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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