I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
im six kinds of drunk right now
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
