hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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