so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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