is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Randomize
