sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize