how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Randomize
